love in the headlines

Its been quite a week for me. Sort of a crazy up and down roller coaster ride. Last Friday I had 3 teeth pulled, oral surgery. Hurts like hell, still, almost a week later.

But then the over the top awesome news:  Vermont became the 4th state to legalize same gender marriage. And in the same week, Iowa! And Washington DC voted to recognize same gender marriages performed in other states. In New Hampshire, the House reversed itself and passed a bill that bars discrimination on the basis of gender identity. Stories of love and hope keep popping up all over. Like this one, and this one. In just ONE WEEK!

And at the same time, the wind is already blowing in the other direction. The National Organization for Marriage has produced a commercial, that apparently will begin airing soon, in response to the headlines.

Wow. What?

What is uber-frustrating is that my head has not been clear enough (vicodin, percoset, lack of sleep) for me to get some thoughts out on the subject. The pain killers are dulling my senses–and creativity, in a week where there is so much news. I can’t think clear enough to be witty or clever to pull together a post worth a damn. This is my 10th and final attempt, and I will publish, even if its crap.

I have so much to say, but find myself only able to express myself in short disconnected bullet-points. So here it is:

  • Fear will not work, it cannot work anymore. Me and my beloved are not the queer boogieman, out there ruining your straight marriages.
  • I do not want to change the way anyone wants to live, or love. I only want to change how our government defines “equal” under the law.
  • How does my love take or violate other peoples “freedom?” Really, I would love to hear this argument.
  • You don’t get to use the rainbow as your symbol (you narrow minded fear mongering people).
  • To my Minnesota friends, if you think Minnesota is right around the corner, or not too far behind on the issue of SSM, you are kidding yourself. Organizations like Project 515 are actively not going after (and in some cases advocating against) same-sex marriage as an issue right now. Really. Read this statement, PLEASE. Then please join me and my friend Jesse and Marry Me Minnesota. On Facebook, please join the group and the Cause. If you read up on how these battles are being won across the country, you’ll see its courageous couples and massive legal fees. Give. Even 5 bucks matters.
  • This is my wish in all of this: I want Pastors, Priests, Ministers and the rest to STOP acting on behalf of the state and STOP signing marriage licenses. Let the courts “marry” or union people. Let the church, bless marriages / unions. Your church doesn’t want to marry queers, fine! No problem. Don’t, please. But if you do, great! You want to be married, under the law–with all the rights and protections it comes with, take it up with the law, the court. “Render unto Caesar the things which are Caesar’s, and unto God the things that are God’s” (“Ἀπόδοτε οὖν τὰ Καίσαρος Καίσαρι καὶ τὰ τοῦ Θεοῦ τῷ Θεῷ”) (Matthew 22:21).

Finally, its Holy Week. My friend Mark sent me this poem called “GETHSEMANI” from a poet, Robert Kelly. I’ll leave you with it.

Kneeling there on the ground all through the night, he whispered quickly but distinctly the name of every person who ever lived upon the earth or ever would live here. He asked if anyone would help, or take his place. We all said No.


3 thoughts on “love in the headlines

  1. ‘This is my wish in all of this: I want Pastors, Priests, Ministers and the rest to STOP acting on behalf of the state and STOP signing marriage licences. Let the courts “marry” or union people.’

    Hear, hear! Actually, I’d like to see a clear separation in language and concept between legal unions (performed by the state) and marriage (blessed by families and faith communities). I don’t think anyone – straight, gay, anyone – should be declared “married” – or not – by the state. (Yes, speaking as a married heterosexual, I would like my legal marriage to become a thing of the past, replaced by legal civil unions for any two consenting adults.) “Marriage” should be something that is determined and blessed solely by the couple and the people who are important to them – family, friends, faith community. Christendom is OVER, Constantine is long dead, and church and state need a divorce on this issue.

    At the same time, I recognize my hypocrisy in suggesting to queer folks that the *legal* entity called “marriage”, to which I’ve always been entitled and to which y’all never have, is an aberration that should be abolished – especially right now when y’all are on the cusp of finally attaining it. But I really do feel like a church/state divorce will be necessary to eventually sort out the dumbheadedness surrounding this issue, and I think “church” (by which I really mean “family and community”) is more deserving than the state is of retaining custody of the term “marriage”.

  2. Those last few words in the video: “coming together IN LOVE to protect marriage” (my capitals). Would someone please like to explain to me why straight marriage needs protecting, and what on earth love has to to do the stance the National Organization for Marriage is taking. That isn’t love, it’s hate and fear.

  3. Pingback: I like it, I like it a lot…. « The Wonderer

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