The conversation continues from my post yesterday. My friend goes on to say (this is the first email in the exchange):
… but people who won’t say what they really believe, or who will say it
behind closed doors but not in public; those are the dangerous folks.
the ones who make you feel safe but then stay silent when you are
being persecuted. the ones who make you feel like their theology is
different but then preach or vote against your family. while i don’t
need the rainbows or the parade, i do need more than silence or tacit
approval. because while i am fortunate to live in a city that is
awesome, have a job, have a family that loves me (even though they
don’t approve of my “lifestyle”) etc. etc. etc. i realize that there
are people who are still being killed. and i know you know all of
this. but what happens, then, when a church won’t take a stand? when
they are silent they are complicit in violence.
and i hope this doesn’t feel like an attack against you (or even
solomon’s porch specifically) but a challenge to be thinking about
what being an ally means (for a church and a community), what it means
to support and love people. i think solomon’s porch is gay friendly
however i don’t think they are allies and that is a huge distinction
in my mind.
i’m not saying solomon’s porch needs to put a rainbow flag on their
building, but i do think they need to be willing to say where they
stand even if it means losing support of the religious right or the
evangelical roots they came from. if they are not ready to come out as
a true ally, then they need to be clear about that as well. it cannot
be a wishy-washy “support” or a silent approval. i see a lot of this
on twitter with the #outlawpreachers hashtag (not sure if you follow
that or not). and i see a lot of people saying, “we all sin and so we
should be forgiving” and that’s just crap. who i love isn’t a sin. who
i was born to be isn’t a sin. but yet those folks say those things and
call themselves allies and the reality is that that isn’t what being
an ally is.
i say all of this encourage you to keep pushing solomon’s porch
further along the path towards being allies. i desperately want them
to be allies, to get off of the fence and to move towards wholeness
for all people. i wish i could be a part of that community, but i
can’t be in a place that won’t state their support without wavering. i
have lost the energy for that fight even though i know it’s important
and i hope that there are people who still do have the energy for it.
Then there are some personal bits I am leaving out but then my friend closes with this:
i really, really don’t want this to come off as an attack. please know this comes from a place
that is grateful for you and your witness and is heartbroken for what i see to be the lack of witness at the porch.
much love to you and your sweetie!!
Next post will include my response to this email. Thank you for adding your voice and joining in the conversation.