one foot, then the other

A rather newish friend asked the other day asked how I was. She noted she was asking because my outside voice seemed rather “not great” lately. My status updates, my posts—or lack thereof—apparently are showing what I have been unwilling to admit to myself. Until now.

I am in a funk. For those of you who do know me, you know I have a lifelong history of depression. I do not think it’s back, rearing its ugly head, but something is amiss. My temper is short, my days are long, my patience is thin and grace for everyone, especially me, feels less than amazing.

Today I took action. I did 2 miles on my eliptical (16 minutes) and called my therapist. I listened to Tara Brach wax eloquent about the storms that roll in, and what we can do about it (called Befriending Irene, its really quite brilliant, listen). I have hope.

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2 thoughts on “one foot, then the other

  1. Very glad to hear that you have hope, and that you’re being so wisely proactive. The change in seasons (or so I imagine) is effing with my brain chemistry too. Bipolar fun: I can’t quite tell which way I’m swinging, if either. Mild symptoms of both.

    I just keep telling myself – if I didn’t have a brain, I’d be much less fun at parties.

    Love to you, friend.

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